This is your flag if you live in the USA.
I’d like you to know why I didn't fly our country’s flag in the past, but now I do.
As a younger person, I didn’t know much about where I came from, and I didn’t know my role in my community. I thought I was just here to help myself and to try and make my family proud. I did what I could to be the best I could be. I worked really hard, I did my best to make as few mistakes as possible, and I learned from them when I did. I didn’t necessarily try to do any of this work for the benefit of others. It was mainly focused on me.
And maybe that’s ok. At that time, I was just learning. I was learning my profession, I was learning how to be a good man, I was learning how to care for myself. We all need to be able to take care of ourselves before we can be much of a help to others. In fact, they literally say this on airline safety briefings: put on your oxygen mask before helping others (you won’t be much help if you’re dead). Similarly, we all go through a period of growth before we gain enough substance to help those around us. It’s tough to help your community when you don’t have much skill to offer.
For me, I saw my country as just a place I happened to live. I didn’t feel any sort of connection to it except maybe when the Olympics were on. I didn’t think much about the place I was born, how I got here, how my country got here, and what that all means. I simply didn’t care due to lack of interest.
Then things changed. They came into focus. Here’s why:
I came into a part of my life where I gained the confidence to help myself and others. I developed the skills to thrive. I can create more than I need. I can share my success, earnings, and time with others. I have something to give. I started to think about what I can give. Should I give? What is my role in my community? I am not particularly wealthy, but I realized I can help my community with my skills and time.
This made me realize that our community is run by people like you and me. Our country is exactly what it is made up of: you and me. It’s not made up of the government. The government only sets the loose standards to live by, but those rules were set up by people like you and me from a couple hundred years ago. They were people who believed in living in a free land without the control of a royal family or as indentured servants. This country was literally formed not long ago as a refuge for immigrants who wanted a fair shot.
Of course, times were different when our constitution was written, but the intent of it was a direct outcome of the adverse lands that our ancestors fled from. As a result, we now have the basic right to live a happy life without arbitrary rules, taxes, or other requirements regardless of who you are, what your last name is, or where you came from. We believe in a fair start, and our country is exactly what we make of it. If we want something to be better, we have the right to start doing it. If we are being treated unfairly, we have the right to stand up against it. There is no sovereign state or caste system that predetermines who we can be. We are allowed to choose for ourselves. We can choose to help ourselves and others. The people of this country are what makes it a country. The sum of the parts is greater than the whole, but only if we work together with the same common goal to live happily in a fair and free place. By acting on behalf of our country, we benefit ourselves and others.
With an understanding that helping my country actually means helping me, helping my family, and helping my neighbors, I was able to understand my role in my community. I realized I had skills that could benefit others, and it became clear that it is everyone’s civic duty to engage their community by participating in it. Help where you can, and take what you need. Give back when you’re able.
So how does this relate back to hanging the flag?
There’s a few loud mouth ding dongs out there that act with a level of ignorance so profound that it makes it on the news, and they seem to embrace the flag as their symbol. With enough media coverage, the image of the flag can be misconstrued to represent their nonsense. This embarrassing behavior causes real Americans not to fly the flag. Regrettably, this was me for a time.
Let us all remember, this is not who WE are.
WE the people, are not ignorant bigots who think we are better than other groups. This is completely contrary to why this country was founded in the first place. We are accepting of all groups, we build each other up, and we build our community TOGETHER. We are not all the same, and that is ok. It’s our right to be different. We are allowed to be who we want to be as long as it doesn’t create unfairness for others. When one person is successful, it helps our whole community to succeed. WE are our country. WE represent our flag. Our flag does not represent the small fraction of a percent of loud mouths who don’t live the American ideals. Those people are no better than the old world lords of Europe or elsewhere who controlled the land and tainted it for their indentured servants. Our flag represents the freedoms that most of our ancestors were not lucky enough to have.
I didn’t quite understand this until I learned about my own family history. I never had any real cultural family traditions. I didn’t really know much about my heritage or what my ancestors were all about. I always assumed it went so far back that it just didn’t matter. That wasn’t true. At a family reunion, in speaking with my parents, aunts, uncles, and looking at the family tree, I realized my own American history didn’t go back very far.
Their grandparents came here from Eastern Europe because they were starving. They farmed land that they couldn’t own due to centuries of lords who controlled those lands and the people on them. They were required to give their crops to those lords as a “tax”, and the lords kept taking more and more land away while requiring more and more crops as tax. Eventually there weren’t enough crops to pay the tax, so the lords would take away even more land. Consequently, there wasn’t enough land to grow enough crops, and there were not enough crops leftover to eat. It was a vicious, desperate cycle that led to starvation and ultimately fleeing the country to find a place where they could have a fair shot without the hindrances of a sovereign power.
America was that place for them and many other families like them. America was a sanctuary for people then - just like it is now. I didn’t really have cultural family traditions because they were intentionally left behind. My great grandparents were happy to become Americans by vacating their oppressed lives and adopting new American traditions.
The inhabitants of this land who are already settled and comfortably established can decide to either accept those in need or to shun them. Acceptance means sharing and welcoming. Starting in a new place takes work. It takes really hard work. America doesn’t give you anything, but it does allow you the opportunity to work for a fair shot, and over time, as you build up your skill, your rations, and understand your own place in your community, you can live a life free of tyranny with the chance to be whatever you’d like to be. And you do all this with the understanding that those before you lived a hard life to enable you to be here, and there will be many more after you to abandon their places of injustice to come and live in this place of freedom.
Don’t lose sight of that.
Have you seen immigrants wearing American flag T-shirts that they likely bought at a gas station? You know the ones with a wavy flag and a soaring bald eagle on it? Those folks are extremely proud to wear that shirt. They are so happy to have the chance to live in a safe place that pays them a wage and offers them the basic rights that every human deserves. They didn’t have those luxuries where they came from, so they savor the benefits they experience within this country, and as first generation immigrants, they are working harder than most people ever will even dream of - just to be part of this great country. My ancestors did that same thing, and I have sincere respect for all of them. I am lucky they did the hard work, and I want us all to work together to help others in a similar situation.
Our grandparents were happy to have the opportunity to work for 50¢ a day to build our country’s roads and railroads. My dad and his dad were happy to have a job for them in the steel mills. It was a hard life, but it was much better than the hopeless situations their grandfathers were forced to flee in Europe. This opportunity is what our country offers, and we all need to ensure we protect it. We work together to make our free system thrive, and we must all be willing to work hard to do it. Chances are that we will never work as hard as our forefathers, and for that, we should be proud to live in this country and honor their sacrifice and step up to work hard any chance we get. We need to honor the sacrifice of those who welcomed them, taught them, and worked together to make our young country move forward.
American history really doesn’t go back that far in comparison to other countries that are thousands of years old. It is amazing that in such a short time, we have become a dominant place of hope and opportunity that is repeatedly a caregiver for the rest of the world. In such a short time, we were able to create a place where people have the opportunity to thrive and to assist others to do the same. There are little blips of time where this gets challenged, so let’s not let those adversaries take ownership of an ideal that they don’t even share. Live your best life and ignore that noise.
Once I started to realize these things, I became more open to understanding my role in the community and how lucky I am to be part of this country. I never had a true hardship due to the sacrifices that were made before me. This is pure luck, and I am honored to work hard for the benefit of myself, my family, and my community to protect what we have and to allow it to endure for those after us.
I never served time in the armed forces. I did receive a congressional appointment to the US Coast Guard Academy, but I ultimately turned it down. While serving in the military is an honorable and direct way of protecting our freedoms, it is not the only way to help our country. The military is one facet of our community, and there’s many more ways to be a positive part of our country.
I do believe that serving in the military is the ultimate sacrifice in protecting our freedoms, however. Sure, our world would be better without wars and armies, but that is not the world we live in. Remember, our country was established due to the inhumane conditions elsewhere, and those adversaries will stop at nothing to undo it all. Our military protects us from that. When was the last time another military bombed your town? Never? Other countries are attacked all the time. It doesn’t happen here though. We must remember to feel fortunate that we have a very low likelihood of seeing a foreign army invade our own backyard. We are very lucky to live here. We have food, shelter, heat, water, and safety. Many places do not.
If you’re afraid to honor the fact that you’re an American, you are taking all of the sacrifices given to you for granted, and you are allowing a small fraction of a percent of internal adversaries to steal your identity. Don’t allow them to force you to adopt a new identity. We are more powerful than that, and you are much more kind, caring, hardworking, and intelligent than them. Our country is yours. You belong here. The flag isn’t for one political party or the other. It’s for both. By thinking otherwise, you are being divisive. Be United, and share the flag with your neighbors - even the ones who are different from you. Be respectful. It is your flag as much as it is theirs - just as our county is built upon a system of checks and balances. Don’t allow or expect all the power to be given to one side. It is shared. Sharing the flag with mutual respect embodies that sentiment.
If you denounce your country or flag, you’re no better than any radicalized group that claims solo ownership of it, and you’re letting them win. If you denounce your flag and country, then what’s your plan? Start a new country? Live on your own (while still enjoying the freedoms your country afforded you)? We live better together. Mankind does not thrive in solitude. Be willing to be part of your country instead of ignoring it. Like JFK said, “ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country.” Participate. Work for it. We will all be better because of it. Don’t give up.
One of my mentors was scrutinized because he had a Betsy Ross flag on his wall that could be seen by others during a virtual meeting (this is the first flag of the USA which has the stars arranged in a circle). Although I didn’t know it, that flag was used by a small, radical group to represent itself. This is a group with beliefs that go against what America represents and against the ideals this county was founded upon. It’s disgraceful that a group could tarnish a symbol of our great country by using it to represent their atrocious beliefs.
Here’s the solution: don’t let them.
That flag is not theirs. It doesn’t represent their beliefs just because they say it does. This country is composed of millions of people that don’t think like they do, so they don’t get to change the ideals of this country. This country already stands for something despite whatever hateful sentiments they may have. Don’t let their voice be louder. We have the opportunity and the numbers, to be even louder. In a democracy, the majority rules. That fraction of a fraction of a percent does not.
Needless to say, my mentor was also unaware that a disgraceful group used the Betsy Ross flag to represent them. He was devastated to learn this, and he took it down - for a time. After giving it more thought (like explained above), he put it back up because it was the more honorable thing to do.
This flag was a gift to him as a thank you token for deeds he performed that were so profound that no item or gesture could ever come close to repaying him. Many people that know him are aware that he went to college and later served time in the army to pay for it. What many people don’t know about him is that he didn’t just take a desk job as an officer to pass his time to get college paid for. Instead, he understood his role, his opportunity, and his responsibility to our country, and he paid his college tuition back by giving his time in a more directly impactful way: he stepped up and became an elite army ranger.
Army ranger school is no picnic. It’s grueling. It condenses the atrocities similar to that of the poor living conditions our ancestors experienced into a few months of terror as those soldiers are tested and trained physically and mentally to succeed in the worst conditions imaginable. They are capable of doing things that even the best American cannot.
He voluntarily signed up for that.
He also got sent into war to help protect our freedoms (several times).
Luckily he came home without physical harm, and he made significant contributions to helping our country succeed. Without getting into gory details, we owe him a great deal of gratitude, and those that fought alongside him were lucky that he was there with them. He’s the sort of guy we are all lucky to have representing our country, and our flag represents him and those like him. It doesn’t represent the low-lifes that threaten our freedom. The flag that was gifted to him is a reminder of his efforts, successes, and losses as he sacrificed so much for you and me. He paid his country back, and we all reaped the reward for his effort.
This is why I fly my flag.
I am honored, fortunate, and grateful to be part of this country, and our American flag reminds me to do my best to give what I can to you and your family. I hope my flag reminds you of that, and I hope your flag will do the same for you and your neighbors.
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